When empaths come to me for a Reiki healing session, they often mention they are seeking stronger boundaries in their day-to-day life. They can usually feel that they are taking on too much of the energy and emotions around them, and want to be able to manage these energies in a healthy, loving way.

It turns out a crucial part of creating boundaries is actually grounding. Grounding is really the foundation, or building blocks, of boundaries. Without feeling safe, secure, and IN your body, it can be hard to assert what is and isn’t ok for your own wellbeing. (Learn more about the basics of boundaries HERE)

So many of my clients are empaths, or highly sensitive souls who deeply feel and absorb the emotions and energies around them. While these sensitivities are quite important and powerful, many empaths feel overwhelmed or ungrounded by this ability.

There is a natural tendency for empaths to ‘escape’ this overwhelm and live in their minds rather than in their bodies. The trouble with this survival tactic is that empaths then feel disconnected from their bodies and all the physical body functions that help them feel grounded.

While it might feel energetically safer for empaths to live in their mind rather than their bodies, being constantly ungrounded also leaves you with weakened capabilities to create healthy boundaries, which can have a domino effect creating anxiety, depression, and overwhelm.

What does “grounding” really mean?

Spiritual and energetic grounding means you are firmly connected to the earth, to your body, and to the reality around you. Grounding creates a deep sense of calm and safety in your body and energy field.

Grounding is simply the process of bringing our attention out of our minds and into our bodies and the present moment. This takes place within all four of our energetic layers; physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.

This might sound very simple, just be a human here on earth, right? Actually, there’s a lot of complex factors that make us ungrounded. Everyone processes energy differently, and your ability to ground comes from your family background, your past traumas, current stressors, and overall energetic sensitivity.

That being said, there are usually some tell-tale signs you are ungrounded that I see often with my clients. *Remember, if you are generally uneasy in your body, but don’t necessarily relate with these symptoms, trust yourself! You know your body best, and just because something isn’t listed below doesn’t mean what you are feeling isn’t real or true.   

Signs of Being Ungrounded:

Physical Body: Clumsiness, hard time sitting still, agitated, trouble sleeping, over-talking to others, trouble communicating thoughts to others, constantly scared or worried about getting harmed, feeling unsafe.

Emotional Body: Uneasy, edgy, not feeling like yourself, unsettled, worried, wishing you could be elsewhere the majority of the time, easily triggered into negative or extreme emotions

Mental Body: Difficulty focusing or completing a task, lots of ideas but no plan or follow through, feeling “in your head” rather than in the present situation, anxious, can’t escape mental “loops” of thoughts and fears

Spiritual Body: Disconnected due to overwhelm, it feels better to be in your head than in your body, escaping to your mind, overly vivid dreams, spiritual theories overtake reality, spiritual bypassing.   

Now that you have a sense of what it feels like to be ungrounded, it can be easy to see why grounding is so vital in creating boundaries.

When we are grounded, it feels easy to make choices that benefit our wellbeing. We know the limitations of our energy and can confidently make choices that support us.

 We’re able to understand how much time it takes to do a task or get somewhere. This allows us to be realistic with our time and choices, rather than over-extending, over-promising, and constantly feeling like a stress mess.

 Along those same lines, it can also be very difficult to say “no” when ungrounded. Saying yes to everything even though you are exhausted or don’t want to is a very common symptom of ungrounded-ness (and, ahem, boundary issues). 

Not surprisingly, all of this translates to creating boundaries with ease.

How to Ground

So, if you are in an ungrounded space, how do you ground? What does that look like in real life? Here are some ways to ground within all parts of yourself:

 Physical Body:

• Cooking and making your own nourishing food

• Make time for consistent movement

• Make time to be outdoors in some capacity

• Consistent bedtime and allowing for enough rest, not just sleep but actual downtime 

• Decluttering-keeping your space simple and clean

 Emotional Body:

• Check in with what you really need-company, alone time? Movement or rest? Honor what comes up

• Communicate needs to others-not expecting they take care of you but that they respect what you need to do

• Notice if you are putting others needs before your own

• Are you “stuffing” feelings or not letting yourself feel what’s going on inside?

Mental Body:

• Journal to clear the mental clutter-try Julia Cameron’s Morning Pages

• Limiting intake of social media, news, and screen time, especially before bed

• Set yourself up for success…write down appointments, make a list of things you said you would do, set a daily schedule, or set reminders

 Spiritual Body:

• Meditation, quiet time, alone time, or some type of time where you can tune into your own spirit (something greater than yourself)

• Nourish your spirit with play, rest, and creativity

• Daily “check in” with your favorite tarot or oracle deck for spiritual guidance or a focus point

• Notice if you are here, in the moment. Are you worrying about past mistakes? Anticipating future ones? Or in your head thinking or escaping so much that you are missing your whole day, or, your whole life?

Remember, grounding is a daily practice, not necessarily a milestone that we “hit” and then keep forever! Life will always throw us stressors, uncertainty, hard events, and daily anxieties.

Some clients worry that grounding will change how they interact with others, or diminish their super-feeling powers. In a way, yes, your energy will shift when you are grounded vs. ungrounded, but only for the better! Being grounded allows you to still feel, empathize, and connect, but in a way that makes you feel at peace, energized, and empowered.

Being a grounded empath allows you to take better care of yourself, AND gives you a larger capacity to care for and love others in a deep, powerful way.